A Trip to the Heart of UP Of Second Chances and History Repeating Patterns

Is that where the lagoon is?
You see, it’s the second time I’ve been to the lagoon. The first time I went here during my first week in UP, I didn’t know what it was called. Back then I thought of it as a nice place to hang out. I really love the sight of trees and the place was a beautiful sight. I really enjoyed my first walk in the pathways of the lagoon. It’s actually sad to think I did not get to visit it again ‘til now because of certain rumors—which are actually true.
I see a bunch of kids on a platform. They’re probably rehearsing for a contest. Carol Fest perhaps? Not far away are three students walking on the path. The girl in the group is in black, just like the girl in a group of three walking behind me. I can tell because I just passed by them.
I’m a few steps from the beginning of the path. I see the green grass, the curvy pathway paved on it.
Now here where the three students were, my surroundings suddenly seemed different. Just a minute ago I was on the roadside. Vehicles came and blew smoke…now it all smells like grass. I smell plants, but not a garden.
Here is where the lagoon starts.
The bunch of kids is students rehearsing after all. They’re practicing a choreographed piece. “Dombre dombre aahh” they chant.
I remember when I used to rehearse for a speech choir in high school. Our main chant was then “Umbalumyung bayung bayung.” All our hard work paid off. We were able to perform a well-choreographed piece at the quadrangle. I-Yanga, and our then president Ronniel Florendo.
These students may take a while.
At my left I see a large trunk with smaller stumps around it. The size of the one in the middle is just amazing. I wonder what kind of tree it is.
This lagoon is terrible. Black water? This is just bad. At least the trees make up for it.
Oh, it’s cement. They’re all made of cement. It’s disappointing, but I have to admit that who ever was responsible did a good job. These look like stumps from a few feet away. I guess the shady surroundings aid a lot in creating the illusion.
Now you may be wondering why I’m here at the lagoon. After all, I did say I had no plans of coming here again. Well, I’m observing the surroundings for a class paper. Look, here comes my classmates now. Some of my female classmates gather on the table as well. There are no more seats left. The others wander elsewhere.
The girls in the platform are doing a formation. Pretty much like a cheerleading pyramid though far from it at the same time. The girl in the leftmost side puts her leg on top of her classmate’s back who is on all fours. Her left arm is perpendicular to her thighs while her right is freely dropped at her side.
Those two guys were the first to come out of the room. One of them utters a curse.
It’s now 12nn. It’s about time I look around.
To my northwest are nice trees. They’re bluish white in color, like those you see in movies when it’s wintertime; no leaves and all that. I must say they do stand out. For the reason being they’re the first I notice. I can also see that my classmates are walking around, looking around. One is standing under a tree, taking notes. The others are as well. As for my seatmates here, they’re watching the rehearsals but I’m not saying that they’re not observing—for they are.
I can’t see Oble from here. What building is that again?
It’s Susan from AOISA walking. What is she doing here?
I met Susan last semester at the Faculty Center. I was trying to contact my cousin when she approached me. She’s from abroad, Colorado I think. So she’s asking me if I’d like to spend a conversation with her about the love of God and all that. I’m already ministry involved in a local church and I told her about it. She said her goodbye then left. She never talked to me again though we meet from time to time.
I want to finish the pathway. Perhaps I should start walking. Hey, it’s “I am a Filipino” by Carlos P. Romulo the kids are rehearsing, the same piece we had in my high school freshman year.
Do you hear the birds chirping? I cannot see them but I know they’re here.
I want to write Dec. 3 on this big cemented stump table as a reply to a vandalism conversation. It says:

Patayin natin ang karibal,
Para walang sagabal!
=Dec. 01, 2009=
=Tuesday=

Sige, patayin natin,
Dec. 2, 2009
Nah, I’ll just walk around. Besides, I’m not exactly into vandalism. Look, a ‘Happy’ peanut wrapper.
I realize I don’t want to follow the path after all. I’ll just walk to the left, I’ve never gone there before. I hear a violin playing.
There’s a monument here by Abueva and sons ’96. Are they Chinese? Ha-ha. I learned from CL40 that Chinese businessmen (aren’t they all?) indicate the name of the founder + sons since it’s always a family business in their case. I live in a Chinese community and I know exactly what she meant by Tan & Sons, Lim & Sons, and the like. I see a lot of these around the corner. (Hey look! There’s Oble.) As for Abueva and Sons, they’re business here is a sculpture of three women holding the Philippine flag. Well, there’s nothing more to see here and this is where the lagoon would end. Do I go left or go back?
I’ve never had a good look at Oble before. What for anyway? Bah, left it is.
Here is the entrance and my way to that place. I’m standing between two white-washed walls with red margins at the bottom. With me is a ‘Sugo’ peanut wrapper and a Y-shaped twig. I don’t suppose they’ll be accompanying me if I walk on. They’re lost. I walk by the right wall.
There are big black ants walking on the top of the wall. It’s not exactly a wall by the way, it’s not that high and it’s just the end of this sort of arena. The ants have silver linings on their bodies. It was just last week when I first saw this kind of ants; for the second time I come across them. I was coming from my CW10 class (the class I’m writing this for—well, mostly) and I had a cup of coffee in my hand courtesy of an event at FC. I was waiting outside room 121 at Palma when I saw the ant. It was all alone and I tried to pour coffee on it. I did not succeed.
Like that ant, I’m alone right now. I don’t see anyone. When I came, a guy was just walking out. It’s a vast green field and my new acquaintances at the entrance had abandoned me just as I predicted. I miss PNU all of a sudden. When my mom was still studying there she used to bring us along. Her classes were on Saturday and instead of leaving me and my siblings at home, she’ll bring us along. I have lots of fun memories there. The one thing I love most about PNU is their vast green grass field. I’ll just get out of here.
I see red flowers on trees, yellow ones on high shrubs. I’m not using the path again. I see that the grass is dead. I’ll just leap over this part of the land. It might not be so safe. Our professor warned us about probable accidents. By the way, remind me to come by FC1013 later. I still have to submit a paper.
I’m now on the paved way, here at the outskirts of the lagoon. I turn around and follow the path.
I’m thinking of eating the mangoes in my bag. I just bought them this morning at Philcoa. I got them for P20 from one of the vendors in front of Mercury Drugstore. I lost 2lbs by the way. I take my measurement every week or two at Mercury. Last week, I gained four.
The same classmate is still on the same spot. She was there when I started walking. I wonder if she even moved. Maybe she’s doing an essay on a spatial perspective or something. That long-haired classmate of mine was my seatmate during the first day. She was playing with a PSP. I haven’t seen her use it again since.
I hear someone approaching; I have to stand aside—but not too much for I do not have much safe ground. He has just passed by. A yellow butterfly is fluttering on a flowerless low shrub.
Isn’t that Carmille over there? I don’t remember if she was wearing red but I can see that she’s wearing a ribbon. That I know. She’s my groupmate and her signature outfit I a comfortable tee, pants, rubber shoes, bagpack, and ribbon. It must be her. I don’t really think it’ll be a good idea to approach her.
The bunch of kids isn’t done yet with their rehearsals. Speaking of which, I have rehearsals. It’s been really hectic and I feel bad I can’t attend as much as I need to.
The smell is just terrible. Are all lagoons like these? I’ve never been to any before except this one at the heart of UP. The pavement is even cracked. It’s not safe here—psychologically even.
There’s a short, narrow footbridge in front of me and ahead is deep grass. I can’t find a way to the Epsilon Theatrum. I don’t intend to come closer to the rehearsing students but I would love to explore a little more. How could people watch performances on that platform? For clearly, there is no place to sit. There’s mud, grass, and puddles of dirty everywhere. The stage is good enough for a small audience though. A small performance will only require a small audience anyway. The students are running from the top again. How do I get there? There’s another foot bridge to my left. It’s a log this time. To my right is a footbridge that looks like a crutch. I’ll go with the left one.
Someone is approaching again, I have to move aside.
What? The log is cement after all. I really have a bad set of eyes. Well, at least I know that it will hold. Do I really want to take this risk?
Last semester in my Comm3 class, our professor held a parlor game. You know, the personality quiz type. There were a lot and one thing I remember well is a result that says I take risks. It’s true to some extent.
“Courage!” the speech choir shouts. It’s the only distinct sound I hear right now. Do I go?
Yeah.
There are a lot of flying objects here. Down there are 3 white flowers, the prettiest ones I’ve seen yet in the lagoon. Everything is foul: black water, the reeking odor, dark leaves, lifeless twigs, and brown insects. The set of flowers is such a beautiful sight, I have to take a picture of it and keep it as a reminder-slash-souvenir. I’m glad I took the risk but I choose to stop here. I’m going back. I hear the waters and their music to my ears. No, why is the water dark? Where has its beauty gone?
To my left are two yellow butterflies fluttering. They’re so small but they bring life to thee black mud and mossy puddles of water.
There are too many insects. There are very small ones and have they not been in a grou, I wouldn’t have noticed.
I hear an insect. It’s a cricket and its sound brings pain to my ears.
It’s all so different from Montalban. The sights in the mountain are very beautiful. It’s sad to think that I hold more memories of what is not beautiful there. I remember every piece of bad mosaics. It’s so different from what I see now.
I hear the violin again. What song is it? It overpowers the insects, the choir, the water, there is no background anymore. The vibrating strings enchant me.
I cannot stand here and listen. I still have lots to do. I face my right and I feel that I am all alone. Over there is someone walking. He’s in black but he’s soon gone. To my left, I know that life will meet me. Reality would strike and I’ll be back to my life.
I have to go back. I need to.